The ‘Venus Butterfly’ is Celebrated as the Ultimate Sex Technique — Does It Really Deliver?

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We’ve all been there, endlessly scrolling through our devices until something grabs our attention. That happened to me recently when I stumbled upon a piece about the most effective sex position for those with a vulva. Suddenly, I was all ears.

If you haven’t heard of it (I certainly hadn’t, but I’m always up for trying new things), it’s called the Venus Butterfly. After two hours of scrolling without really absorbing anything, I was fully engaged.

For many vulva owners, reaching orgasm through vaginal intercourse can be elusive. Statistics show that only about 25% of us experience climax from penetrative sex alone. Um, 25% is hardly enough. Who wants just a quarter of their favorite dessert or to watch only a quarter of their must-see show? That means a whopping 75% of the vulva-owning population isn’t getting the satisfaction they deserve. I count myself among them, as my body often requires clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm. This highlights the need for variety in our intimate experiences, as discovering what works well can lead to mutual delight.

When I learned about a sex position specifically designed for vulvas, I was eager to share it with others while also wanting to try it myself ASAP. I’m thrilled to say that the Venus Butterfly is as delightful as it sounds (I’ve had three orgasms this week, thank you). Additionally, it’s quite comfortable for the receiving partner, which is always a plus.

The Venus Butterfly was first described in the 1988 book The One Hour Orgasm: How to Learn the Amazing ‘Venus Butterfly’ Technique by Leah and Bob Schwartz. According to their method, the giver should stimulate the receiver’s clitoris or hood with the penis positioned at either the two o’clock or ten o’clock angle. This involves applying gentle pressure with one thumb beside the clitoral shaft while the other thumb rests just inside the vagina. The technique emphasizes consistent light pressure until the receiver approaches orgasm but doesn’t quite reach it, allowing for multiple climaxes if desired.

But that’s just one way to enjoy this position. As noted by Men’s Health, it can also enhance oral sex experiences. The receiver lies on their back with legs spread, resembling a butterfly’s wings, which gives the giving partner optimal access to the vulva and vagina. Kenneth Play, creator of the Sex Hacker Pro Series, explains that the Venus Butterfly can stimulate multiple erogenous zones, which can lead to heightened pleasure.

If you think this is merely a twist on the classic missionary position, you’re not wrong. That’s reassuring for many, as missionary is often a go-to position. The main difference is that you elevate your legs, allowing your partner easier access to all your intimate areas. Combine this with toys and fingers while receiving oral, and you may just witness your orgasm in its stunning transformation. However, remember that everyone’s body is unique, and not every position will feel right for you. Life’s too short for a sexual experience that doesn’t bring you joy.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, my partner seems eager to explore some butterflies — I believe that’s my cue.

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In summary, the Venus Butterfly is a sex position created with vulva owners in mind, aimed at enhancing pleasure through focused stimulation of multiple erogenous zones. It combines comfort with the potential for multiple orgasms, making it a technique worth trying for those seeking new experiences.


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