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I Faced Mom-Shaming on Instagram for Having a Mental Health Condition
by Mia Harper
Updated: November 1, 2021
Originally Published: November 1, 2021
Fifteen-year-old Mia would absolutely cringe if she could see me now. If she were to meet the current version of me—a writer and Instagram content creator who embraces life in a body I adore while navigating a mental health condition I was unaware of—she’d likely want to hide forever.
In her teenage years, Mia sought external validation, fearing rejection at all costs. She often masked her true feelings behind a forced smile, trying to suppress her beautifully chaotic self.
To my younger self, I would say—hang on tight, because this is just the beginning!
Hello! I’m Mia Harper, a mother managing Complex PTSD and Functional Neurological Disorder. I frequently share my healing journey from childhood trauma on social media, proudly discussing my experiences with mental health disorders and disabilities. Recently, one of my posts went viral in a way I never anticipated.
The video that unexpectedly launched me into the social media spotlight was a 30-second clip of me recovering from a seizure while my two-year-old cuddled me. This post has exploded with over 1.5 million views, 60K likes, and countless comments.
Alongside the video, I received an overwhelming outpouring of support from parents and fellow trauma survivors, as well as curious questions about my seizures. I even had some overly zealous individuals praying for my quick recovery, which was a first for me in the realm of social media.
However, amidst all the positivity, a wave of mom-shaming comments hit me hard, and I’m ready to address it openly.
So, grab your favorite mug, warm up some coffee, and join me as I dive into some of the not-so-kind comments from individuals who believe I shouldn’t be a parent. I’ll be responding to these criticisms just as publicly as they shared their judgments, because the stigma around mental health needs to end.
Alright, let’s get into it. While not all comments directly questioned my parenting ability, some were downright hurtful. For instance, someone suggested I should “just be normal,” which is akin to asking gravity to stop working—impossible!
And seriously, are you implying I trained my child to provide cuddles during a seizure? Who’s taking care of him? His loving parents, that’s who! It’s baffling to see someone try to play detective on my life, proclaiming, “are we not all missing the obvious?” It just makes you sound rude.
There’s also a troubling suggestion that people with disabilities shouldn’t have children, which echoes eugenics. The assumption that every parent with a mental health condition is aware of their situation and has access to resources for healing is misguided.
It’s particularly upsetting when someone who has a child in their profile pic tells me I shouldn’t have kids. That’s just wrong.
Let’s clarify what happened in my video. I was enjoying a peaceful morning with my kids and husband when I unexpectedly experienced a non-epileptic seizure. I asked my husband to record it for both my medical team and to help break the stigma around mental health, trauma, and disabilities.
After the seizure, my sweet two-year-old approached me, repeating the comforting words we share with him when he’s upset. It made my heart swell more than any cute animal video ever could.
These episodes are genuine seizures that I’m fully aware of while they occur. They’re completely beyond my control and stem from conditions I did not choose. There’s nothing absurd about sharing my journey or the tender moment with my child.
What’s truly absurd is the assumption that someone could will a seizure to happen or that there’s something inherently wrong with a person experiencing one. And let’s not even start unpacking the mental health implications for my kids. Yes, they’ll likely need therapy like many kids today, but they’re well-loved and thriving, enjoying pizza in our cozy living room like little raccoons at a midnight feast.
Did a bunch of Karens wake up one day and decide to unleash their ableist views on me? What’s truly damaging is the fear of judgment that prevents parents from seeking necessary mental health support. My experiences of childhood trauma have left scars, which is why I’m committed to therapy and medication for my well-being.
Do you have any idea how exhausting it is to be the one breaking the cycle of abuse? Clearly not, because you’re wasting your time criticizing a mom with seizures on Instagram instead of focusing on your own life.
But guess what? I’m not going to let your comments drag me down. Instead, I’ll be enjoying a movie night with my kids, wrapped up in cozy blankets and savoring every moment.
If you or someone you know is in crisis or struggling with self-harm, please reach out to The National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.
Summary
Mia Harper, a mother living with Complex PTSD and Functional Neurological Disorder, shares her experience of facing mom-shaming on Instagram after a video of her recovering from a seizure while cuddling with her child went viral. Despite receiving support from many, she encountered harsh criticism from individuals questioning her ability to parent due to her mental health condition. Mia addresses the stigma surrounding mental health, highlighting the importance of understanding and compassion for parents navigating similar challenges.
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