Everything You Need to Know About Pregnancy and Delivery

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Are you expecting a little one and feeling a mix of excitement and apprehension? You’ve found the right guide. Here’s a comprehensive overview of pregnancy, from conception to delivery.

FIRST TRIMESTER:

• You might find yourself developing carpal tunnel syndrome after spending countless hours online searching for answers about those peculiar aches in your pelvic area. Is it just cramps or could it be early pregnancy symptoms? The search can be overwhelming.
• Even if you’re actively trying to conceive, there’s a good chance you enjoyed a glass of wine or a smoke just days before discovering your pregnancy.
• It’s a secret relief to have a valid reason for not sucking in your stomach. However, until your belly becomes more pronounced, you may just seem a bit bloated.
• Transvaginal ultrasounds can feel like a bizarre sci-fi experience, as they involve devices that resemble high-tech dildos covered in protective sheaths and plenty of lubricant.
• There’s an unspoken competition among women about who experiences morning sickness and who does not.
• Without a visible ‘I’m pregnant!’ sign, you may find people assuming you’ve undergone breast augmentation.
• Hormonal changes can be intense. If you lash out at someone for stealing your parking spot, you can just blame it on your hormones.
• You’ll likely hold your breath until you reach the end of the first trimester.

SECOND TRIMESTER:

• Expect to spend at least 20 minutes admiring your profile in mirrors or any reflective surface. You’ll celebrate when your belly “pops,” but it might still just look like a bloated stomach.
• Your hormonal fluctuations can provide an excellent excuse if your partner brings home the wrong flavor of ice cream.
• Prepare for vivid dreams—though they may not be the kind involving rainbows and unicorns. Think more along the lines of what a teenage boy experiences.
• The first time you think you feel your baby move? It’s most likely just gas.
• At the 20-week ultrasound, expect your baby to resemble a character from a fantasy film—think Voldemort.
• Many expectant mothers may find themselves fantasizing about their obstetrician or midwife.
• Maternity bras aren’t exactly stylish.
• Belly bands can be lifesavers.
• There’s another unspoken rivalry between those wanting to know their baby’s sex and those who prefer to wait.
• Your nipples may darken and even begin to leak.
• And yes, you may find yourself passing gas frequently during this trimester.

THIRD TRIMESTER:

• The sugary drink used to test for gestational diabetes might make you swear off sweets for a while. If you have a choice, opt for the yellow flavor.
• Intimacy may turn into a tricky game, akin to naked twister.
• Cocoa butter won’t prevent stretch marks, so don’t waste your money.
• You’re not glowing; you’re just sweaty from hormonal changes.
• Getting off the couch will feel like a heroic feat, prepping you for the monumental walk down the candy aisle at the store.
• Some friends may tire of your endless belly photos on social media.
• You might find yourself buying classical music CDs and wooden toys while judging parents with kids who blast hip-hop and have plastic toys.
• If your healthcare provider checks your cervix during Braxton Hicks contractions, you may want to kick them—but you’ll probably just end up looking silly in stirrups.
• You may feel like a beached whale, but remember, you are beautiful.
• Your mucous plug can be quite an unpleasant sight.
• If you want labor to begin by your due date, avoid packing your hospital bag, don’t shave your legs, skip the pedicure, and for goodness’ sake, wear your dirtiest underwear.

BIRTH:

• You may feel like you want to die.
• You might also have a strong urge to take your anger out on the person who “did this to you.”
• Expect to scream, kick, and possibly lose control of your bowels—multiple times.
• At some point, you will realize you can handle this, and you will.
• Pitocin isn’t evil, but it can lead to increased bleeding.
• Don’t be surprised if you find yourself making outrageous offers to the anesthesiologist for an epidural—remember, you don’t have to endure pain if you don’t want to.
• If you feel a sudden urge to have a private moment in the bathroom, it’s likely time to start pushing.
• You may develop a surprising affection for someone in the delivery room—just not your partner.
• All the olive oil and perineal massages won’t guarantee you won’t tear, and if you don’t tear, it’s okay to be a little envious.
• The relief you feel when your baby arrives is indescribable.

And yes, all of this is worth it—even the vivid dreams during the second trimester.

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Summary:

Pregnancy is a rollercoaster ride of emotions, physical changes, and challenges. From the initial signs to the final push, each trimester comes with its unique experiences. While the journey can be daunting, the rewards of bringing a new life into the world make every moment worthwhile.