Why I Won’t Tell My Son He Can Be Anything He Dreams

Pregnant woman bellyhome insemination kit

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As a new mother, I’ve found myself weaving little untruths for my son. For instance, when I promise him ice cream tomorrow, he often forgets by the time the next day arrives, and I conveniently avoid bringing it up. I know that indulging him would spoil his dinner, so I stay silent, and by the time he remembers, we’ve already passed the ice cream shop. Instead of a treat, he ends up with a healthy meal at home—an example of a harmless fib told to protect his well-being.

Similarly, there are times when I threaten that if he doesn’t sleep within ten minutes, I’ll go to bed without him. The reality is, no one in the house gets to rest until he’s asleep, but the thought of me leaving him alone in the dark is enough to sway him into surrendering to sleep. I may bend the truth a little, but it’s for the greater good of our nightly routine.

I have also told him about Santa bringing gifts and will continue this tradition for years to come. The Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy will also make their appearances in our household. These are fibs I’m comfortable with; however, one phrase I refuse to utter is, “You can be anything you want to be.”

I understand that this saying is often shared with positive intentions—it’s meant to inspire and motivate children to dream big. However, I believe it carries the risk of setting unrealistic expectations. I wholeheartedly believe in my son’s potential, but the truth is that everyone has limitations, including him.

Not everyone possesses the aptitude to excel in every field. Some people may not have the dexterity required for surgery, others might lack the patience essential for teaching, and some individuals might simply be too tall to fit into a fighter jet. These constraints are a natural part of life.

What I do want for my son is to explore his interests and capabilities. If he wishes to try out for the spelling bee, even if he struggles to spell “cat,” I will support him. I’ll help him practice and prepare, and if he wants to join the band or choir, I’ll encourage his endeavors, despite any lack of musical talent. Whether he wants to pursue football, tennis, or golf, I will ensure he has the opportunities to try them out.

I am dedicated to helping him improve in whatever he chooses, as long as he remains committed to putting in the effort. If he aspires to be a pitcher for the baseball team year after year, I will support him, even if his physical strength may ultimately limit his success in that role. And that’s perfectly fine. I want him to understand that some dreams may not be achievable, which doesn’t equate to failure; it simply makes him human. There will be areas where he excels and others where he may not, just like everyone else. It’s my responsibility to guide him through this realization, because if I don’t, someone else will—and they won’t have the same love and support I have for him.

At this stage, my son is just a toddler. I have yet to discover his strengths, height, or drive. I don’t know if he will seek the spotlight or prefer to remain behind the scenes, nor do I know if he’ll be more inclined toward sports or academics. But I do know that I won’t mislead him. If a dream is unattainable due to his physical or personality traits, I will be honest about it.

Because as his mother, I cannot tell him that lie.

For those exploring options for pregnancy, resources like Hopkins Medicine offer excellent guidance on various insemination techniques. Additionally, if you’re interested in home insemination options, check out Make a Mom’s guide to artificial insemination kits, which provides insightful information on the process. You can also explore Make a Mom’s comprehensive 21-piece at-home insemination kit for a detailed look at home insemination tools.

In summary, while it’s essential to encourage children to dream, it’s equally crucial to help them understand their limits. By providing honest feedback and support, we prepare them for the realities of life, ensuring they can navigate their paths with confidence and resilience.


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