(Almost) Everything I Learned About Parenthood Came from My High School Experience

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During my high school years, I enrolled in a Sociology class that included two significant assignments: planning a wedding and simulating parenthood. My classmates and I partnered up, organized a mock wedding complete with white gowns and cake, and participated in a staged ceremony in the auditorium. One memorable aspect was the young, attractive teacher who played my father, much to the delight of many female students.

As part of the assignment, my pretend husband, a friend named Jake, had to persuade my “father” to allow our fictional marriage. This exercise offered a simplistic view of what real-life relationships entail. The complexities of marriage, from partner dynamics to financial considerations and family influences, are far more intricate than our classroom simulation suggested.

Following this, we were tasked with “parenting” a bag of flour, which we affectionately named Bella after a character from a popular series. The rules were strict: we couldn’t leave it unattended or put it away, and we needed to share the responsibility of caring for it—much like real parents.

Having since welcomed an actual child, I realize that the flour sack experience was merely a fraction of what parenting entails. However, I’ve recognized several other school subjects that prepared me more thoroughly for motherhood:

1. Drama: Acting skills are essential for parents. Whether it’s using silly voices or feigning anger while laughing inside, the ability to perform is invaluable. I can embody various characters—from animals to superheroes—and even sing songs in amusing voices.
2. Debate/Negotiation: Engaging in bedtime negotiations can feel like a diplomatic mission. The dialogue often goes like this: “It’s bedtime.” “Why?” “You need to rest.” “Why?” “Because you’re three.” “How about one more story before I sleep?” “Just get into bed.”
3. Algebra: If x represents the hours remaining until a toddler wakes me and y signifies the sleep I need, then y-x equals a severe lack of rest.
4. Chemistry: Consider this equation: one newborn (NB) plus one hormonally charged new mother (HNM) multiplied by postpartum anxiety, combined with a relatively rational partner (RRP). The outcome? It’s still a work in progress.
5. Music Appreciation/Band: If you endured a performance from beginner musicians, you can withstand any cacophony produced by your child’s instruments. Remembering those moments makes the current noise seem manageable.
6. Physical Education: While I might not have learned much that directly translates to parenting, the skills I picked up in PE helped me navigate the physical demands of caring for children.
7. Home Economics: This class attempted to equip me with homemaking skills. Although sewing remains a challenge for me, I can whip up a meal from scratch, all thanks to the lessons learned there.

I owe some appreciation to my high school experience for unknowingly preparing me for motherhood. For those on a similar path to parenthood, exploring resources like this at-home insemination kit can be incredibly insightful. Additionally, if you and your partner are navigating your fertility journey, check out this guide for intracervical insemination, which provides expert advice. Also, for further information on pregnancy and home insemination, Medical News Today is a fantastic resource.

In summary, the lessons learned during high school, although seemingly trivial at the time, have surprisingly equipped me for the challenges of parenting. From negotiation skills to the ability to improvise, these experiences have been instrumental in my journey as a mother.