25 Indicators That You Are a Parent to a Toddler

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Updated: November 7, 2020
Originally Published: October 31, 2012

1. You experience an unexpected foot on your chest during a conversation.
2. During breakfast, a slipper is thrust into your face.
3. An email with the subject line “Head Lice” awaits your attention.
4. Phrases like “I wish I had a trunk like an elephant” start to feel completely normal.
5. You find yourself explaining, “generally, you shouldn’t put things in your butt. It’s a rule.”
6. An Exersaucer occupies a prominent spot in your living room.
7. A pants-less three-year-old is face down in the Exersaucer, shouting, “Help, I’m stuck on a cliff!” while an infant cries in the background.
8. You engage in a conversation while attempting to sleep.
9. Someone is chatting with you as you brush your teeth.
10. You are expected to play hide and seek while you are in the bathroom.
11. While lying in bed, you refuse to open your eyes, even as someone walks on your ribs and asks, “Mommy, did it tick yet?”
12. Your tea or coffee is never consumed while warm.
13. You can’t remember the last time you finished a cup of tea or coffee.
14. The bathroom floor is littered with a high-heeled shoe, an egg beater, a Viking helmet, and a swim board.
15. You feel a burst of nostalgia upon seeing the high-heeled shoe.
16. A trip to IKEA to replace a mattress with your partner feels like a romantic outing.
17. You finally wear your high heels and a trendy faux fur vest, only to find a Charlie Brown sticker dangling from it.
18. Waking up at 7:20 AM feels like a significant accomplishment.
19. You might not recognize a song by Florence and the Machine or One Direction, but the Exersaucer tunes are stuck in your head.
20. Misplacing a beloved teddy bear feels like a catastrophe of epic proportions.
21. You find joy in spotting a garbage truck.
22. You have to consciously avoid saying fighted, eated, and breaked.
23. Indulging in sweets during the day is a luxury of the past; if chocolate cake is an emergency craving, you resort to hiding to enjoy it.
24. A phone call with a friend resembles this: “Hey, friend, (Yes, three-year-old, I’m boiling water for your hot chocolate. Warm chocolate, sorry). Yes, friend, go ahead. (Yes, three-year-old, I’m still boiling the water. Please don’t do that, you might fall!) Sorry, friend. (Oh, wow, awesome!) I can multitask!”
25. As you navigate the kitchen, you step on a toy that starts playing music or lights up. You pick it up, knowing you’ll trip over it again shortly.

This article was originally published on October 31, 2012. For more insights on parenting, visit Make a Mom. For comprehensive information regarding home insemination, check out this link. Additionally, American Pregnancy is an excellent resource for those exploring pregnancy options.

In summary, parenting a toddler is a unique experience characterized by unexpected challenges, humorous moments, and a constant juggling act. Each day brings new surprises, affirming the chaos and joy that comes with raising little ones. It’s a journey filled with laughter, learning, and love.