Angela Was a Myth: Unpacking Motherhood Misconceptions from ‘Who’s the Boss?’

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Angela from Who’s the Boss? made juggling career and motherhood appear effortless. She scored a prestigious agency role, had a baby, employed a charming (retired professional athlete) housekeeper, and seemingly thrived in her dual roles—all while managing a few awkward nude scenes. As a child, I admired her life, aspiring to replicate that seamless balance.

However, after achieving a career and welcoming a child, I discovered the truth—it was far from easy. Initially, I immersed myself in literature about “having it all,” only to realize that the reality of motherhood didn’t automatically come with a clear path. Many women don’t have the privilege of choosing between staying home or returning to work. When my maternity leave ended, I faced an emotional upheaval that transcended anything I had previously experienced. It felt like, upon giving birth, I was also handed a hefty dose of guilt.

I first became aware of this guilt when I closed the door behind me to head back to work after 12 tumultuous weeks of maternity leave. Leaving my precious newborn—who could only drool and was famous for marathon feedings—felt monumental. That simple act of shutting the door conveyed a wealth of emotions, as a wave of longing washed over me. My husband gently ushered me into the elevator, his hand on my back as tears blurred my vision.

Yet, I loved my job. It was as if instinct and reason were engaged in a fierce debate, reminiscent of the classic devil-and-angel trope. I believed that by “leaning in” a bit more, I could continue to make strides in my career. I was the first in my family to graduate college, and I was inspired by the generations of women who fought for the normalization of working motherhood. I thought, “I can do this. I want to do this.”

Then came the travel. Just the thought of it, even months ahead, intensified my guilt. Trips to the West Coast or overseas were particularly challenging; FaceTime conversations were rushed and often occurred during a meltdown—mine or my baby’s. Sure, the thrill of visiting new cities invigorated me, but it was quickly overshadowed by the need to check my phone for updates and pictures from my family.

Despite the excitement of major presentations and brainstorming sessions, a subtle shift began to occur. My passion for work gradually diminished. I vividly recall a moment during a conference call when the babysitter sent me pictures of my children at the park. As the call concluded, one question loomed large in my mind: “What am I doing?”

Three weeks ago, I made a pivotal decision to resign from my job. I find myself uncertain about whether I can manage life as a stay-at-home parent. There’s a strong possibility that within a month, I’ll be yearning to return to my former role. I’m not a great cook, often making multiple trips back inside just to leave the house. Patience is not my strong suit, and I struggle with impulsive shopping that derails my budgeting efforts.

Do my children even want to spend all day with me? It’s hard to say. What is clear is that this dilemma—how to balance career aspirations with the desire to be present at home—is a common struggle. Often, women are forced into rigid categories: career-focused or stay-at-home. The reality is that many of us exist in a complex gray area, feeling guilt regardless of our choices.

Certainly, some women, much like Angela, have clarity about their career aspirations or their desire to focus on home life. Yet, the majority of us navigate this confusing middle ground—guilty for working, guilty for staying home. What we truly need is to support one another, fostering open conversations about these challenges.

Now, three weeks into my new role as a stay-at-home mom, I feel more confident. I’m at peace with my decision for myself and my family, at least for now. This acceptance will make those heart-shaped peanut butter and jelly sandwiches at the park even more enjoyable.

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In summary, the narrative of motherhood portrayed in media can be misleading. Many women grapple with the complexities of balancing careers and family life, often feeling guilt regardless of their decisions. It is essential for us to support one another through these challenges and recognize that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to motherhood.


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