In the realm of social media, many new mothers can relate to the unsolicited attention from fitness coaches, particularly those affiliated with Beachbody. As I scroll through my Facebook feed, I often encounter messages from friends who have become self-proclaimed health coaches, eager to share their expertise on “losing weight and achieving wellness.” It’s an all-too-familiar scenario: a congratulatory note about my recent twins, swiftly followed by an invitation to join their “incredible company.”
For those who have not experienced this, consider yourself fortunate. It seems I have become a prime target for these messages, especially since I recently gave birth. The underlying message is clear: “You must be desperate to shed that baby weight!”
Let’s address the obvious. First, thank you for the congratulations, but please stop implying that I need to lose weight. I hardly know you! Each time I receive such comments, they chip away at my self-esteem. This insecurity can echo in my interactions with my young daughter, who is always observing my behavior.
One of my biggest fears as a parent is that my insecurities may hinder my daughters from developing a healthy self-image. When you offer to “help” me get fit, what I hear is a suggestion that I should scrutinize my food choices, leading me to count the calories of the cupcake I shared with my little one. She notices when I refrain from enjoying the cookies we baked together or when I prioritize workouts over rest because I feel pressured to be fit.
“Just buy the Shakeology!” you might say. “It’s the cost of a single Starbucks drink per day! Surely you can manage that?” To which I respond, “I haven’t indulged in a Starbucks since before the twins arrived.” My priorities lie with my daughters’ needs over your shakes.
Now, don’t misconstrue my stance; I value a healthy lifestyle and aim to model this for my daughters. However, I take issue with the prevailing narrative that glorifies strength as synonymous with flat abs and muscle definition. This message inadvertently communicates to my children that their worth is tied to their appearance and dietary choices.
I would rather teach my daughters to enjoy their meals — like finishing their broccoli before relishing chocolate cake — and to engage in physical activities for the joy they bring, not out of obligation to appear strong. It’s vital for them to understand that there’s no such thing as a “cheat” day; all foods can fit into a balanced approach.
I want my daughters to listen to their bodies instead of succumbing to societal pressures that dictate who is “fit” or “skinny.” Their value should not hinge on their appearance or eating habits. The best way for me to instill this belief is to embody it myself.
So, I implore you: please cease targeting me during this transitional phase of motherhood. Let me embrace my “mama love handles” and enjoy this precious time without pressure to join your team. I’m dedicated to raising confident, balanced women, and I refuse to be sidetracked by external pressures.
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In summary, the unsolicited advice and invitations to join health coaching programs can be detrimental to postpartum women. It’s crucial to foster a nurturing environment where self-acceptance and balance are prioritized over societal expectations.
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