Social Media During the Holidays: Not Always a Joyful Experience

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It can be tough to manage all the emotions that come up while scrolling through social media, especially around the holidays. In a recent chat with Scary Mommy, Dr. Sarah Thompson, a clinical psychologist and the author of “Logged In and Stressed Out: How Social Media Affects Your Mental Well-Being,” shared some useful insights for navigating the ups and downs of social media during this festive season. With 69% of adults and a whopping 86% of young adults in the U.S. engaging with social media, it’s clear that these platforms play a big role in our lives.

Social media often showcases only the best parts of people’s lives. Dr. Thompson points out, “Upward comparisons happen when we compare ourselves to those we perceive as more successful or attractive. This can lead to feelings of envy, resentment, and shame.” We’ve all been there—scrolling through photos and thinking things like, “How do they get their kids to smile like that?” or “I wish I could afford a new car like that.” Those negative feelings can actually offer a chance for emotional growth and self-improvement.

As the new year approaches, if you’re looking to foster a healthier relationship with social media in 2022, Dr. Thompson has some advice. She emphasizes the significance of understanding your attachment style and how it influences your relationship with technology. According to attachment theory, the way we connect with our primary caregivers shapes our future relationships, including how we engage with social media. Some attachment styles may be more vulnerable to the negative impacts of social media, making it essential to set boundaries around your online presence.

This is a crucial lesson to impart to your kids, especially during the holiday season. Their friends may be flaunting the latest sneakers or gadgets, and that can lead to feelings of inadequacy. Dr. Thompson suggests four tips to help both kids and parents manage social media:

1. Help Kids Gain a Realistic Perspective: Let’s face it—social media is often a highlight reel. We rarely see the messy realities of life. Teach your kids that what they see online isn’t the whole picture.
2. Cultivate Mindfulness About Social Media: Encourage regular check-ins with your child about their online experiences. This can help them reflect on their emotions and what they encounter.
3. Teach Emotional Awareness: Discuss how social media might affect moods, particularly during the holidays. If you know that a quick scroll might lead to a bad mood, skip it and focus on self-care instead.
4. Encourage Real-Life Connections: While it might feel old-fashioned, nothing beats face-to-face interactions. Discuss with your kids the importance of maintaining offline relationships. If in-person hangouts aren’t possible, they can still connect through calls and texts.

As our relationships with social media evolve, consider taking a break during the holidays. It can be exhausting to scroll through feeds for hours. Use this time to connect meaningfully with your family and appreciate what’s right in front of you. Remember, everyone’s online life is often more polished than reality.

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In summary, the holidays can be a mixed bag when it comes to social media. Teaching kids about the realities of online life and promoting real-world connections can help everyone maintain a healthier perspective.