As we gear up for another holiday season, many of us are looking for ways to ease the stress that often accompanies this time of year. During our first holiday in the pandemic, my family made the decision to skip our usual big family get-together for the first time ever. At first, we felt disappointed, but then we discovered the joy of a low-key Christmas right at home. It turned out to be a wonderfully relaxing experience, especially for me, as I typically shoulder most of the holiday “fun” responsibilities.
With the holidays approaching again, I’m eager to keep the spirit alive while lightening my load. I reached out to a few experts, including Dr. Lisa Carter, a psychologist, and Mia Thompson, a busy mom and author, to get their insights. Here’s what I learned about creating a joyful holiday season without the added pressure.
Choose Mindfulness Over Busyness
Dr. Carter pointed out that during the holidays, we often operate on “autopilot,” rushing to fulfill all the traditions. She emphasizes the importance of being intentional about what the season means to us. Instead of getting lost in the chaos, prioritize your mental health. For me, meditation apps have been lifesavers in finding that calm amidst the holiday hustle.
Create a Family Plan
Mia suggests that her family makes a holiday bucket list each year, highlighting the traditions they truly enjoy. Her list might include baking cookies, watching classic films, and driving around to see festive lights. By focusing on what truly matters and noting the “nice-to-dos,” you can significantly reduce holiday stress.
Check In With Yourself
Remember to take a moment to reflect on your needs during this busy time. Dr. Carter stresses that self-awareness is key, as our needs change. A simple self-check can provide insight into what you can do to enhance your well-being.
Set Boundaries
We’ve all been there—those family members who bring up uncomfortable topics. Dr. Carter advises being clear about your boundaries. If a conversation turns awkward, don’t hesitate to say, “I’d prefer not to discuss that.” If boundaries are ignored, it’s okay to excuse yourself from the situation.
Prioritize Self-Care
Mia reminds us that women often put themselves last, especially during the holidays, leading to burnout. Consider what self-care looks like for you—whether it’s taking a walk, reading, or simply enjoying a moment of quiet. It’s essential to recharge so you can give your best to your loved ones.
Plan Ahead
To effectively set your boundaries, strategize before the holiday gatherings. Identify what triggers you and prepare responses or exit strategies. This foresight will help ease any anxiety you may feel about certain topics or situations at family events.
Reject Perfectionism
We often see picture-perfect holiday scenes in movies, but it’s important to remember that real life isn’t like that. Dr. Carter encourages letting go of the “perfect” holiday expectations. When we chase perfection, we miss out on genuine joy.
Ask for Help
Don’t hesitate to reach out for assistance. Whether it’s enlisting family members or using services, getting help can free up time for what truly matters. It’s okay to delegate tasks so you can focus on enjoying the season.
Say No When Needed
Creating a holiday bucket list can help you recognize traditions that may not resonate with your family anymore. It’s perfectly fine to decline certain invitations if they feel burdensome. A polite, “Thanks for the invite, but we won’t be able to make it this year” is sufficient. Use that time for what you and your family enjoy—like cozying up in PJs with hot cocoa and a good movie.
As you navigate your holiday plans this year, aim for less stress and more moments of joy.
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