By: Sarah Thompson
Updated: Dec. 9, 2020
Originally Published: March 19, 2018
I always believed insomnia was a challenge faced by others—those individuals with peculiar body clocks that somehow manage to function on less than the recommended 7-8 hours of sleep. To me, insomnia seemed more like a temporary inconvenience, a fleeting moment of sleeplessness due to an overactive mind. I often heard others casually mention their insomnia, noting that they were a bit tired, but that it was something they had grown used to. I thought it primarily affected people already grappling with anxiety or depression, believing it would eventually resolve itself.
That all changed one fateful night when I found myself wide awake in the dark at 3 a.m., questioning where my once-healthy sleep routine had gone. Insomnia had struck, and to my surprise, it can hit anyone at any age for countless reasons. It’s not just a nuisance, especially when you’re trying to parent the next day; it can transform daily activities into monumental tasks.
When a hungry infant or a sick child wakes you up, it’s easier to rationalize the sleep deprivation as a phase. However, insomnia brings its own relentless cycle of anxiety, worrying about how you’ll sleep tonight, and the nights after that. The fact that your own body is the culprit intensifies the struggle because there’s no one else to blame.
Most people experience temporary insomnia, often triggered by significant life changes or emotional turmoil—this is known as acute insomnia. It can accompany events like a divorce, job loss, or the passing of a loved one, and typically lasts up to three months before resolving. Unfortunately, some face chronic insomnia, which is characterized by trouble sleeping at least three nights a week for over three months. This can be attributed to a variety of factors, including stress, overall health, late-night caffeine or alcohol consumption, medication side effects, or mental health issues.
My own insomnia began when my daughter went off to college, coinciding with hormonal changes in my body. This perfect storm resulted in my body being wide awake and ready to seize the day at 3 a.m. Maintenance insomnia describes this situation: falling asleep is possible, but staying asleep becomes a monumental challenge. After a couple of hours of tossing and turning, I’d finally begin to drift off, only for the alarm to go off shortly thereafter.
Any type of insomnia can wreak havoc on your day. Lack of sleep can turn even the simplest tasks into Herculean efforts. You might find yourself navigating through the day at work while hiding behind your desk or even napping during lunch. Yet, being the primary caregiver for young children while sleep-deprived is a whole different ballgame. Suddenly, pushing a child on a swing feels like running a marathon, and the constant calls of “Mommy, Mommy, Mommy” can feel like a woodpecker drilling into your brain. By the time dinner rolls around, your eyelids feel heavy, and your body is on the brink of collapse.
Regardless of the type of insomnia you’re facing or the reasons behind it, there are solutions available—whether they be behavioral, homeopathic, or medicinal. It’s essential to address your insomnia not just for yourself but also within your family. Just as you would explain a cold to your children, you can help them understand insomnia as a legitimate issue, fostering a supportive environment where everyone can work together to make necessary adjustments.
This also presents an opportunity to teach your kids about the value of sleep, helping them recognize their own sleep issues and encouraging them to seek help when needed—much like how I’ve learned to manage my own struggles.
After two decades of parenting, I’ve realized that when I get a good night’s sleep, everyone benefits the next day. Prioritize your rest starting now. Seek assistance if necessary, and for further insights about insomnia and treatment options, visit the National Sleep Foundation.
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Summary
Parenting while dealing with insomnia can be a daunting challenge, impacting daily tasks and overall mood. Understanding the nature of insomnia—whether acute or chronic—and seeking support can lead to better management of sleep issues. By fostering an open dialogue within the family about sleep, everyone can work together to create a more restful environment.
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